Where to Begin

Having never been through this process, I had no clue where to begin.  My good friend gave me a spreadsheet she had created that listed countries and any regulations they had on adoptive parents and costs and requirements.  What it boiled down to was that with 6 biological children already in our home, we were left to adopt from China, Ethiopia or Russia.  Russia required 2 extended trips, making the cost much more than the others.  Leaving our Fish Sticks here for 2 long trips didn't seem like a good option for us.  Recently China and Ethiopia have tightened their reins on adoptions and the waits were looking like 3-4 years.  That seemed like a LONG time to wait.

And so I shifted my attention to domestic adoptions.  I talked with a friend who adopted 2 children from a local organization whose focus is helping troubled teenage girls.  I purchased an application, printed it and got to work filling out and doing what I could on the check list.  I called the organization and was discouraged to hear that they only do 2-3 placements a year and have about 15-20 waiting families.  What were our chances to be chosen among many infertile couples?  This came as a discouragement but I constantly was telling myself that this was NOT about us but was God orchestrated.

Although our plans to adopt were not public, I started talking to people who had adopted.  I wanted to know who they went through, how long it took and what the process was like.  Time and time again the same words came back to me.  Get the process rolling if God has laid this on your heart AND HE WILL DIRECT.  It was more confirmation to me that this is a God thing and He will shut and open doors as He sees fit to show us what to do.  These words have brought me peace.

I called another local agency that also shared that they do about 6-8 placements a year with 20 or more families waiting.  She also reiterated that about 90% of expectant mothers choose a couple without children.  So it doesn't take an Einstein to do the math.  Statistically, our chances were slim.

We decided to tell the Fish Sticks that we were in the research phases of adoption.  They all squealed, hooting and hollering.  Little Josiah (5) came to me and said, "Mommy, don't get a black boy.  Get a white boy."  I was shocked by this sentence and said, "Oh no, Sweetie!  We will most probably NOT get a white baby but a black or brown one."  He said in his most frustrated voice, "Then how are we going to speak Spanish to him???"  We all laughed and assured Josiah that language would not be a barrier with his new sibling.